Bush Revises Stimulus Deal to 'Rebate All of It'

Great fake news from ScrappleFace

“It just makes sense,” said White House spokesman Dana Perino, “that if $800 per person would stimulate the economy, then giving back all the money to the people would spark a capitalist revival and a golden age of prosperity.” ...

To mollify members of Congress concerned that any new tax legislation include a “pay as you go” provision, the president offered to eliminate Congressional earmarks, the IRS, the Department of Education, the National Endowment for the Arts and the Medicare prescription drug benefit, as well as federal funding for the Corporation for Public Broadcasting, Amtrak and all pork barrel projects.

If only the real plan made as much sense.